I am 45 years old and have had rheumatoid arthritis for four years. When I was first given the diagnosis I was relieved just to know what it was I needed to fight. I was tried all the time all of my joints ached and I was swollen everywhere. My husband had to put milk in my coffee in the morning because the gallon of milk was just too heavy for me to lift. He carried me up the stairs to bed at night and got me dressed in the morning. I was working full time, raising two children, and going to college at night and on weekends to become a nurse. My husband wanted me to quit college because I was in so much pain. I could hardly stay awake to read the textbook let alone hold them. But I was determined to finish college. I found a very good rheumatologist who was trying everything to help me feel better. Every couple of weeks I would go back to his office and he would ask how was I feeling. One day when he asked that question I had a question for him. Will I ever have a day when I'm not in pain? Because if I have to live in pain each and everyday, being tired and unable to enjoy life, then something has to got to change. He told me about a new drug that was helping lots of people with RA and the he felt it would help me. The drug was very expensive and most insurance companies would not cover the cost. He gave me the prescription and I left feeling like I had a new weapon to fight the disease. Little did I know that the fight would be with the insurance company and my place of work.

I spent several months trying to get my place of employment to allow me to try the drug. My sick time could be reduced and production maintained if I were pain free. Next I had to convince the insurance company to allow me to take an injectable drug, because they didn't cover drugs delivered in that manner. The battle went on into weeks. I felt that I needed some help, so I called the Arthritis Foundation and spoke to them about my fight to get this new drug, enbrel. They listened and gave me support to fight the battle to help bring the issue to light through legislation. In the months that followed, between fighting the insurance company and work, I got sicker from the stress and tension. People at work begged me to give up, my family wanted me to give up because they saw what all the fighting and arguing with the insurance company and work was doing to me. I was fighting the whole system! I had to get very ugly and nasty to make other people understand that I was not going to let this disease get the best of me. I was just about to start a new career as a nurse. A career where I was going to be helping people. I watched as people that I had worked with for many years move away from me--calling me a troublemaker and telling me that I couldn't have everything I wanted. I didn't want everything! I just wanted to be able to work, to have energy left at the end of the day. To be pain-free. Was that everything? Because if it was, then I wanted everything. I spent a long time disturbing  standard procedures and forcing established systems to rethink their programs, so that my healthcare needs could be met--o that I could take enbrel, the medication that works best for me. Enberl has totally changed my life. I'm working as a nurse 12-hour shifts and except for some stiffness now and again I am pain free.

Some people were very angry with me for taking such a hard stand and sticking to my guns. My determination was ugly at times, but I don't regret it. I have learned a lot from the whole experience and now use the knowledge to help other patient with RA. I believe God must have put me through that pain for a reason. Enbrel is a wonder drug for me, and I'm not sorry for all the hell I raised to be able to take it. I will support others in their fight to obtain medications they need to relieve their pain. Everyone deserves the right to the specific medication that relieves their pain without cost being the prime factor.